He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
