You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I will pee on everything he values.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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