I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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