Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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