is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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