Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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