Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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