I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize