Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
