Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
