i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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