Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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