There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
my poor anus
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
