so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
