yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
