if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I believe in your delicious
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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