I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
