Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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