Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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