i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I wish you could order shots online.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
