Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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