Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
