Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
