Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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