i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize