Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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