McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize