there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
