I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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