the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
