we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
