Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
honey bunches of taint.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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