we have officially lost it.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize