Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
