worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
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