He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
