I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
