How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I met the friendliest cop last night
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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