i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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