Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
