That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
