I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize