Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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