Barsexuality is the new black.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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