i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
