if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
