I'd wear matching sweaters with you
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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