Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
