Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
