Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
